On Hiatus

Before I published “The Inside Story of Leverage Research 1.0,” I promised that I would follow up with a piece about the fact-checking process. I am still planning that piece, and I’m also planning some other articles.

However, in the last few weeks, as I’ve tried to go on working, I’ve found that I am working at a small percentage of my usual capacity. I did my best to engage on social media, especially Twitter/X, after the Leverage story came out. But aside from that, I’ve only written 387 words of the fact-checking post. This makes no sense… except that I’m very tired. I feel tired in a way that I have never felt before.

I was in denial for a while, but at this point I have to admit that I need a break. In “The Story Behind The Inside Story,” which I published just before the Leverage story, I wrote a bit about what the last few years have been like for me. I feel a lot of relief now that things are more settled, but wow I’m tired.

I have also been, honestly, contemplating whether I still want to spend the rest of my life working in media. Maybe there is a career shift lying in wait for me? Or maybe I just need a break and to come back with fresh eyes. Not sure. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the adage that “most people overestimate what they can accomplish in one year, and underestimate what they can accomplish in ten years.”

I’m extremely grateful for the feedback so far on the Leverage story, and also grateful to the fascinating people who have reached out to discuss ideas. I remain happy to talk about the media industry in the abstract, and I’m also happy to discuss ancillary professional questions in this age of upheaval, so if you’ve been thinking “I should invite Lydia to coffee and talk about [professional thing],” please do!

For reference, here are posts I still hope to write at some point:

• A post discussing the fact-checking process, and meta framing choices that I made, as related to the Leverage story.

• A post about my past history in the sex-positive feminist movement. I’ve seen a lot of commentary on social media about sex-positive feminism, and it feels like I could be helpful by describing what made the movement what it was. (I previously mentioned this here.)

• Another post about my time in the Peace Corps circa 2010. When I wrote my last post about my Peace Corps time, about a year and a half ago, I intended it as the first of two posts. Unfortunately, that post went viral in a particularly weird and draining way (I always find viral exposure weird and draining, but that was a bad one). So, I still want to write the followup — and I don’t want to give mean people on the internet the satisfaction of me not writing the followup — but what can I say, sometimes bullying works as intended.

• I would sincerely love to publish another issue of my magazine and curate articles/stories/art by other people, not just me. We’ll see!

There are various strategies for reducing my social media attack surface, and I intend to use some part of this hiatus to figure out which of these strategies I will employ. If I’m going to work in media at all, I simply must reduce my vulnerability to people who like to lash out on these platforms. (And if I’m going to switch careers, then I need to decide which aspects of media I want to continue participating in, and how.) Some people thrive on the oppositional energy of social media warfare, but I am not one of them (or rarely, anyway). If you are a person with expertise in helping minor celebrities not go insane from social media exposure, please feel free to drop me a line.

I’ll still post intermittently on Twitter/X and Instagram, and maybe sometimes in Substack Notes, because these are part of my social world and I don’t think vanishing completely from the internet would be good for me. However, for the next while, I hope to avoid writing anything longer than a normal length tweet :)

Thank you for being here :)